Finally, he said, softly, ‘I don’t know what I should do.’ She thought about it for a few moments, and then said, ‘I think you should go home. Stay for a few days. See how you feel when you’re with them instead of me.‘ He sighed. ‘I don’t know. They were mad at me when I left. We’ve only spoken a few times. They might not want me anymore.’ ‘If you go back to them with that attitude, you’re never gonna know your real feelings.’ He nodded. ‘You’re right.’ ‘Think about it. Let me know when you decide.’ He was quiet for the rest of the day. She hoped it was because he was lost in thought, and not because he was avoiding the decision he had to make. When they were at dinner she asked, ‘Have you decided?’ She was surprised when he nodded. ‘I’m not going back. I don’t need to see them again. I will arrange to send two-thirds of my income to them.’ ‘Don’t do that. It will be like you died. Think about it – Jane lost her husband to a car crash. I lost Jack in a plane crash. We both know. The divorce also will free me of any legal obligations to you and to Henry’s child you will have. I can never absolve you or forgive you of the infidelity you have engaged in. What I want you to know is that I am trying hard not to hate you. There were mitigating circumstances. You were a prisoner but you didn’t try to get free or to fight him physically. Perhaps it is best you didn’t fight him but his first sex with you was not entirely like a rape from a stranger who would then flee after killing you. My heart and mind is in confusion about what you told me. I want you to forgive me for the hateful things I said and for striking you that morning. I let my emotions get entirely out of hand and I ask for your forgiveness for that strike. I see your face is still bruised badly but most of the swelling has gone down.’ Continuing before she could speak, ‘The reason I came hear is to let you help me understand the life you led while you were there. I don’t want to hear about sex. I want.
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