All my girl gear still called to me from the backof the closet where I stuffed it in shame, but that wasn't new. The newprescription came, and, of course, I started taking them.I was terrified that the drugs would immediately start changing my bodyin ways I couldn't hide before I could get myself under control and getout of this stupid obsession. Every morning I got paranoid as I lookedin the mirror. Were my features getting softer? Nipples puffy? A newroundness to my hips? It was impossible to tell day to day, but no onegave me any strange looks, so maybe it was all in my head.No, the thing that did me in was exactly what had started this, myboner. The Dr. Hillard was right, the new drugs did start helping outwith 'unwanted erections'. The only problem was, it didn't stop megetting horny, it just made it much harder to keep it up and get off.The come down from an ejaculation had been my safety valve. I gothorny, dressed up, came, and shamefully purged myself of girlie. I glanced up as four men walked into the bar. “I think my ideal man has just walked in,” I said and nodded to Sarah to take a look. She knew at once which one I meant. “The one with the eyes?” she asked and I nodded again. He was beautiful. I had always been attracted to older men, although my experiences to date were with guys my own age. He was mid- to late-thirties. To a twenty-two year old, he was definitely an “older man”. He was well built, like he worked out but not to the point of vanity, with short, light brown hair and the most spectacular eyes. Even from the distance I was sitting, I could sense their piercing quality and the frame of long, dark lashes. I was too shy to talk to him but at some point he arrived with his friends at every bar we visited that evening. As the evening was drawing to a close, I knew I had to do something about this burning attraction. Eventually, spurred by being somewhere where nobody knew me and by more than a few cocktails, I asked him if.
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