I went on to explain that I spent hours reading the stories on the site getting ideas for my own. I said that I found most of the stories good but some were really bad. “Oh what makes them bad?” she asked, raising an eyebrow. This was going to be awkward, how was I going to explain to her without using language that offended her. “Well,” I said, “they start a story, a couple meets she, unzips him, takes his you know what out and gives him a blow job, he undresses her and they have they sex and the story is over in a couple of paragraphs. No foreplay, no kissing, or affection. Just wham bang thank you ma-am sex.” I could see that she was blushing and I apologised to her. “Oh I'm sorry Hazel, I haven't known you long enough to talk like this, I hope I didn't embarrass you.” The redness on her face faded and she smiled. “No, Mike,” she said, “I agree with you. Sex should never be, wham bang, thank you ma-am. It should be slow and sensual with plenty of foreplay.” She blushed again then. He's still learning to shave or to start a conversation with a pretty girl. He still hasn't figured out that a baseball cap has a brim to shade his eyes, not the back of his head.These are all great reasons to keep our kids at home to learn a little more about life before sending them off into harm's way.Let us old guys track down those terrorists ... The last thing an enemy would want to see is a couple million hacked off old farts with bad attitudes and automatic weapons, who know that their best years are already behind them.HEY!! How about recruiting Women over 50 ... in menopause! You think MEN have attitudes? Ohhhhhhhh my goodness!!! If nothing else, put them on border patrol. They'll have it secured the first night!This one is compliments of Chuck ... it may be a repeatTwo women were playing golf. One teed off and watched in horror as her ball headed directly toward a foursome of men playing the next hole.The ball hit one of the men. He immediately clasped his hands together.
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