Boudi

“I found her in the Kitchen when I came in, crying into a cup of coffee. She was filled with guilt and didn’t know how to balance her feelings for you and Jim. I knew you had brought her in while I was with Pete, in fact I had 2 very nice occasions last night that had nothing to do with my partner.” She giggled enjoying the experience I was giving her by rubbing in the shampoo. “Beth and I talked for about 30 minutes, I reassured her that you wouldn’t do anything to upset their marriage. Her issue was if she was going to do something that might upset what they have. I asked her what she would have to do differently now she had her feelings for you. You’re not got going to go anywhere and she isn’t so life doesn’t have to change. The more we spoke the better she started to feel. When we came to bed, she decided that she would feel better is she woke close to Kym, that’s why she wasn’t with you this morning.”“I feel bad for not being there for her last night, I should have known that. She knew I was holding back, and wasn’t happy about it. “Why can’t you hold me?” Why not indeed. I seemd to have shrunk that part of my brain away to almost nothing, filling those spaces instead with all sorts of weird and poisonous rubbish, various kinks and vices the like of which the internet seems to have something for everyone. Maybe if I tied her up, put a bag on her head, and covered her with jello first? She would never go for it, and quite frankly, neither would I. “I could hold you, but my heart would not be in it. And I’m scared.” “Of what?” “That if I do start to like it again, things will soon be back to normal and I will have to go through another six months of learning to go without you again.” She was starting to get annoyed now. “So what will it take?” “I really don’t know, there’s been a lot of damage done. Maybe we need some kind of a fresh.
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